Friday, December 16, 2005

uhaul life

i love how this blog randomly decides the time stamp of my posts. ah, so that's what i was doing at 3:72 a.m.! i'd forgotten.

so, i moved today. i woke up miserably hungover to my phone ringing. it was will calling to figure out if he should come over. clock said 9:30. brain said: ____. clock said 9:31. brain said: OH HELL! HANDBASKETS! HOCKEY STICKS! i was supposed to be up at 6. my uhaul reservation was for 9. i hadn't packed a darn thing, and all i wanted was to obliviate in the fetal position in the bathtub.

so i throw my stuff in boxes and myself on the subway, and i retrieve the van. new york driving: lanes and traffic lights are mere suggestions to be considered and then, perhaps, dismissed. of course three cars fit side by side in a lane. run a red light, sure, why not! honk if you feel an itch. honk if you see a cute dog. and park wherever - you won't find a spot and they'll ticket you no matter what. mine was for $115.

so we move boxes and furniture parts and it all goes relatively smoothly. until will takes off and i drive the van back down to chelsea. halfway there it occurs to me: oh, i don't have my wallet. oh, i don't have my credit cards. or my drivers license. or my jacket. in fact, with $1 in my pocket and dressed in a shirt and jeans, i have no way to get back uptown. and it's winter. so, one very cold sojourn at the uhaul office later, i get ahold of andrew who takes a cab from work, picks me up, gives me money and sends me off to 96th. thank god for friends. really. and the uhaul people were great - much love. i on the other hand was a disaster.

and this was the shortened version of the saga! omitted dramatic elements: the threat of the transit strike. the happy traffic cops. the happy traffic cop who came up and tapped on my window as i sat at the red light and pondered my licenseless driving. and as i rolled down the window, i wondered in the pit of my stomach what on earth i could have done wrong while idling at a red light. but all he wanted to say was, "why don't you smile? things can't be that bad!" weird. how did he know. do people normally strike up conversations with mopey girls driving uhauls?


oh oh oh! fun short movie idea. guy gets kicked out of his apt and moves into an elevator. has a lamp, a nice little chair and desk, some bookshelves. even leaves room for one person to ride up and down. somehow sleeps on a plank that's leaned diagonally across, kind of like sleeping on an airplane. he snipes at people who come home late and drunk. he leads a generally good and cozy life. um, i guess some dramatic arc is lacking, but this was what occurred to me as i and my things filled an elevator and all of a sudden the idea of paying no rent and having all that upward mobility was quite appealing.

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